By In life, things change in depressing forms and shades, even sometimes the people who establish bonds of love with you, as your soul mate, change in the hurtful way that serves a blow to one’s psychology.
The people who remained in one’s avenue of love, disappear unexpectedly from someone and leave that person in constant mental unrest. No one knows how many people confront such tragedies in their lives.
My somber life, too, portrays a depressing art. Art that makes my life suffocating. I often find my soul complaining to me about someone who used to accompany me and solace my very feeling of survival in these cold and terrible nights of Shaal.
I still remember your every beautiful gesture, particularly the heart-breaking smiles that combined with the absolute soothing power of pain, gave colors of joy and pleasure to my life.
All those cherished moments of my life, the memorable gatherings with you, the exchange of stories, your beautiful conversations of love, passed so abruptly that left a poignant impact on my personality.
Still, I can barely think you are separated from my soul; no matter how far your body is from me. When you were beside me, I felt nothing but hopes that Kindle and sustain life. I dedicated my every loving thought to your service, yet you left without any sign and color. I always ask myself! what things compelled you to go away and left two beautiful souls in a state of depression.
Since you left Shaal, its atmosphere and people, once used to be ideal, created an extremely suffocating place for me. And, I suffer in it every day. When I sit alone on these terrible nights, my soul reminds me again and again of those gracious moments which I spent near you.
For the last years, I have completely changed in a way that I even can not fully recognize myself. My soul is wandering around some gloomy pillars which often sting my body every day. After your departure from the shadow of my life, since then Shaal has adopted an uncomfortable attitude towards me which usually makes my soul plunge off the bridge of life.
I can not forget those promises you made to me, Sammi (Though her name was not Sammi, I used to call her by that name because I found something strange, something pretty beautiful in this word that always accentuated my every feeling towards her).
The word has left a distinctive sign on my personality ever since I met you in Shaal. How many days, in fact, months have passed, still your warm hugs combined with mesmerizing emotions of love and your serene company has not returned.
Truly Sammi, it becomes much difficult for my lonely spirit to live with your incomplete thoughts- which make my every feeling-oriented towards you. One day, as usual, I was making haste on my way so that I could reach the class(At DELTA) on time, suddenly I listened to her voice saying, “wait for Nizam! We will go together for the classes”.
But when I did stop for a while and put a perfunctory glance back, I could not notice anything. For a while, I stood paralyzed in the same position and I remembered her when she used to say,” Nizam! I can’t come so fast, take slow pace” when we used to attain classes to gather. Since you have gone, it remains the usual phenomenon which harnesses my life.
Every moment my soul remembers those moments which we spent together.
I wonder, how the people around me remain unchanged despite you are no longer among us. Once again Sammi, winter has spread its wings, I fear I may not
be able to survive cruel waves of winter nights of Shaal being further away from you.
Your absence, however, wings away all feelings of joy and comfort now.
I feel I am losing the true color of life- a color which your presence once bestowed me a glory. Everything has been changed after you disappeared from Shaal except our unfading memories of love.
On these cold nights, only the feeling of your company can empower my body. I barely know what things compelled you to depart my life.
After your departure, my life has been entirely changed. Sammi! my every feeling awaits for you!
Despite these tragedies, I am optimistic that one day you will come into my desolate life and throw the leaves of love. We are constantly being bombarded with the conviction that the bond of true lovers establishes in the sky. The Hope of witnessing you(Sammi) is still alive in me. A hope of thy company is living in my soul Sammi.
Written by Nizam Hassan
The writer is based in Awaran, Balochistan …
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